If love is the purest form of giving and not expecting anything in return. Then Why does it hurt to love?

I was stuck on this question for so long. Love in its purest form does not expect anything in return. It is just a form of giving and being happy to do that. Love is Spritutal. And when i talk about love i am not classifying it as motherly love or romantic kind of love. Love is just Love. It is highest form of surdender. I often found myself in situations when i wanted to keep beliving on this feeling but i didn't feel any happiness in return. Even to my surprise there was pain. There was hurt, for not being treated the way i wished. I tried to nullify these feelings. I still wanted to give love in the purest form. I was still trying to stick on my belief and not expect anything in return. Therefore, i simply adopted a method where i just forgave the other person even without them ask for my forgiveness. I thought it was noble thing. I wanted to restore my faith and feel happy. But there came a point in my life when i stood up and asked myself. Are you really happy? Not expecting and being treated ill way are two different things. I saw people toying with my faith. Not respecting how i feel. That made me to realise NO I AM NOT HAPPY. And i cannot keep lying to myself. Yes, my love was still selfless. It still wanted nothing in return. But my love for myself mattered more at this point. I realised my responsiblites for myself. Therefore i moved away from the thing which was proving little toxic for me. However, there are still days when i question myself with the same. I ask myself if i was selffish? I still wanted the person i love to be happy anyways. But i was so sure that i didn't want to be with that person anymore. I was not happy. I wanted to be away to restore my faith. To love myself the way i want. My love still wants the best for everyone. This blog is very personal for me. Probably i won't release it publicly. Those who know me know about this experience too. I want to know your opinion about this.

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