The grass "is" greener on the other side

 Some days, its all about spending too much or too little time awake. You be in your room for hours, don't you want to go out a little and enjoy the sun? No. Some days you are just by yourself. 

They say "The grass always seems to be greener on the other side". Sometimes it not just seems to be but it is true, the grass is indeed greener on the other side. You sit and think, sometimes for 15 mins sometimes straight for an hour, you just THINK! what have i done not to deserve the completeness other's have? you ask, you keep on asking. No one answers, because you are asking it to yourself and self-answers does not come that easy. Well, maybe there exist no answer. Have you ever thought of that? Maybe the whole purpose of this timeless thinking and questioning is for nothing.

Then what is sense? what is the sense of this suffering, this hatred and all these feelings, what is the sense if there is no ray of sunshine at the end of this dark cloud? 

All this intellect seems too much for my little mind sometimes, sometimes i don't feel the same person i am. But at last, no one knows everything about themselves as they claim to know. All of this might not make no particular sense for you how so ever or you might still be here reading and relating a bit. Maybe. Or maybe not. 

You know, it will make sense someday. This may sound a piece of crap today, even for me but you learn, you always learn best things from the worst experiences. Some experiences may leave scars forever  but you are not supposed to keep the experience with you, you just need to learn lessons, learn what not to do next time. 

Some day when you will be worried about other things you might not realize that you are in a better place now. You will grow as a better person, you will move to a better place, you leave all this negativity around you, you will be okay. 

"You will be better tomorrow."