If love is the purest form of giving and not expecting anything in return. Then Why does it hurt to love?

I was stuck on this question for so long. Love in its purest form does not expect anything in return. It is just a form of giving and being happy to do that. Love is Spritutal. And when i talk about love i am not classifying it as motherly love or romantic kind of love. Love is just Love. It is highest form of surdender. I often found myself in situations when i wanted to keep beliving on this feeling but i didn't feel any happiness in return. Even to my surprise there was pain. There was hurt, for not being treated the way i wished. I tried to nullify these feelings. I still wanted to give love in the purest form. I was still trying to stick on my belief and not expect anything in return. Therefore, i simply adopted a method where i just forgave the other person even without them ask for my forgiveness. I thought it was noble thing. I wanted to restore my faith and feel happy. But there came a point in my life when i stood up and asked myself. Are you really happy? Not expecting and being treated ill way are two different things. I saw people toying with my faith. Not respecting how i feel. That made me to realise NO I AM NOT HAPPY. And i cannot keep lying to myself. Yes, my love was still selfless. It still wanted nothing in return. But my love for myself mattered more at this point. I realised my responsiblites for myself. Therefore i moved away from the thing which was proving little toxic for me. However, there are still days when i question myself with the same. I ask myself if i was selffish? I still wanted the person i love to be happy anyways. But i was so sure that i didn't want to be with that person anymore. I was not happy. I wanted to be away to restore my faith. To love myself the way i want. My love still wants the best for everyone. This blog is very personal for me. Probably i won't release it publicly. Those who know me know about this experience too. I want to know your opinion about this.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Accept your gloom

Image
" Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody"                                                                                                            -Mark Twain      No one in this whole world is purely good, full of light. Each and every one of us has a dark side, and this darkness does not makes you a bad person the proportion does. Have you ever got mean to someone? or broke someone's heart? If you answer this as no, then think again cause you have everyone of us have. And if your answer was, yes but i had my reasons, then this article is worth a read. " Forgiveness for other is always easier than self forgiveness" Forgiving is always considered to be self less action, you are always told that forgiving makes you a greater person. And it does! But it has always been easier to forgive someone else rather than living with your guilt, caring that baggage, unable to consent your sins. It is easier to accede
Read more

My take on "Man's Search for Meaning"

Image
  "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human's freedoms- to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." -Viktore.E Frankl  This beautiful extract you just read is from the book "Man's Search for Meaning". Since I just finished reading the book, I wanted to talk about it's "impact". It's the kind of book which stays with you for a lifetime and what makes it so special is it's not exactly a "story book". The first part of the book describes Viktore's experience in a concentration camp, which is a place where minorities or political imprisonment happens. So the book has a very dark start. The author talks about his hopelessness, how difficult it was for him and people around him to find the will to survive, as these people were not thieves or murderers. These people were civilians, normal working class people with a normal job and a normal life just
Read more

Equality

 So.. what does first comes in your mind when you here the word"equality " Some of us maybe thought of women's  right, some of reservation system and some other thought 'oh i am general doesn't  means  anything  to be'.  But does this  is really  equality?  Think... Equality  is not 0.4+0.6, equality  is 0.5+0.5 which makes us one. Government  has given us the source for having equal rights but do we really  know how to use this? Being a girl it is difficult  to say, but girls have got many rights and powers and offcource they deserve this but only a few knows how to use it effectively while many of us are just busy in making  out profits from what we got. We also see now a days some fake cases being  registered  about boys  for teasing  and all and also it is easy to do so, i don't  say that girls don't  deserve  respect , they do deserve and more than boys! All i say is boys also deserve  to have a seat in metro, and also to be  RESPECTED! Eve
Read more